i like the man i am fucking, just not in that way.  my shallowness is stupid and distasteful yet there is nothing to be done about it.   i am older and not looking for a man to father my children.  i am looking for a man who is physically beautiful to me as well as my mental match.  unfortunately, it now seems that the physical outweighs the mental—hence my inability to feel “romantic” or sexual about the man i am fucking.